Inescapable end

Thoughts turn to the terminus,
No matter my banishing them.
The road nears the cul de sac,
Which I will sooner and surrend.
No comfort that it's not I, one.
Best each alone will exit
In pain or peace, who knows?
Prepare but mostly know
Thy days are fewer than you've had.
See how I avoid and place
What is only essentially mine
To a you, not me, as if I
Would exit even this.
I'll have inevitably my and own.

The best English teacher for you

[An experiment. The intended audience is not clear, as is clear from how it is written. Will rewrite, maybe.]

You want to learn English. You sign up for a course, or you find a tutor. Then you begin your lessons. One problem remains for many students. You don't know your new teacher.

You quickly learn that your new teacher speaks too fast or too slowly. You learn this person does not correct you very often. You learn that this teacher wants you to read more, or write more, and then more and more and more. But you want to be able to speak in everyday situations. You want people to understand you when you speak this language. You want to understand what people say to you.

You now have a problem. You have a teacher or tutor. That's good.  There is something wrong. Your new teacher is not right for you. Not to worry. You can solve this problem.

Read this sentence carefully: You can change your teacher. This sentence has two meanings. One, you can find another teacher, and you can have your lessons with a new teacher. Now, is this new teacher better for you? For example, does this teacher ask you what you want?

• "How often do you want me to correct you when you speak?" 
• "What subjects do you like to talk about?" 
• "Do you need to read better in English? to write better?"

Two, you can change teachers by telling him or her what you need. In other words, you can teach your teacher to be the best for you.

• "Please speak more slowly."
• "I do not understand. Please repeat what you said."
• "I want to understand songs in English when I listen to them."

The best teacher for you teaches by doing and saying things for you. We say she or he has "you in mind." Your job is to tell your teacher about yourself and what you want.

You can begin by answering these two questions: What do I like? What don't I like? Here are some examples answers. I like it when my teacher:

• is an actor--she shows me what she means by acting like  someone or something.
• explains grammar, so that I can see how English is different from my language.
• asks me to imagine things, where I learn new words for things I know already.
• smiles and tells me when I say something correctly.

I do not like it when my teacher:

• talks all the time and does let me talk.
• always asks me, "Do you know the English word for this?"
• gives me something to read without telling me first the meaning of some important new words. 
• looks unhappy when I make an error.

Your answers to questions like these about what you like and what you don't will help you find, or teach, the best teacher for you.

For students of all ages, feelings are important. A teacher's happy or sad face makes a difference, and different students like different faces. How you feel while learning a new language is important. Do you feel good about your lesson today? Are you happy with what you did in your lesson? Was your teacher patient with you? Do you feel your teacher likes you?

Some teachers do not think feelings are important. They think that what they teach is the most important thing. Yes, English as a foreign language is an important subject, and yes, your teacher must know the  subject very well. But how you feel when you are learning is also important.

For me, I think of it this way.

• Am I happy and comfortable during my lesson? 
• Does my teacher smile and tell me when I do something well? 
• Does my teacher correct me gently and clearly?
• Is my teacher patient?

When I answer no to these questions, I do not want another lesson with that teacher. There is my answer to which teacher is the best for me.

Which teacher is the best for you? Make a list of what you want your teacher to do and say. Make another list of what you do not want from your teacher. Discuss your lists with your new teacher. Or, find another teacher. You will learn more from the best teacher for you. You will also learn faster.

Language lesson feedback--to get and to give

[An experiment. The intended audience is not clear, as is clear from how it is written. Will rewrite, maybe.]

Feedback in the language lesson is information you get, or give, about what you or someone did. People--teachers and students--use feedback to do better next time, or, if there is no problem, to continue speaking, reading, writing, and listening without change. But practically what does this mean?

Take this example. Someone asks you this question: "Where do you live?" You answer: "I am living in London."

Is the question correctly stated? Yes. Is the answer? No.* The answer should be, "I live in London." We use the present tense to talk about something that is true in the present, something that happens again and again in the present, and something that is always true.

The corrected statement and explanation are two pieces of information to use so you can construct the answer correctly next time.

Your teacher (or tutor) can correct you in many ways, but by giving you feedback, this helps you with information you need so you can correct yourself.

When you use English, especially when learning the language, you can be correct or incorrect, right or wrong. You can make an error or a mistake. You can nail it or mess it up.

Beware. Not all of these words or expressions say the same thing. What are the differences among these? Here is a little scheme to go by,

• correct/incorrect, positive and slightly negative
• ---/error, negative or slightly negative
• good/---, positive 
• informative statement(s), neutral
• ---/mistake, slightly negative
• nail it/mess it up, very positive and (said with a smile) encouraging
• nothing said aloud or shown, positive
• right/wrong, positive and negative

These are just some of the words and expressions to talk about performance, how you are doing. You can think of each one as information you get.

You will notice that each of these words or expressions has a feeling to it. Of course, how someone says something also carries a feeling. However, when someone says, "You made an error. You are wrong." This negative feedback feels negative. You can feel bad about your performance when you hear feedback like this.

In the first example above, the feedback is neutral leaving you with the ability to answer correctly next time. You have the information and reasons for answering in the correct way.

On the other hand, if you get positive feedback like, "That's correct. Good job," you can feel good and do the same next time. We--most students--like positive feedback. It feels good and we want to feel positive about our performance.

Giving feedback so that the other person performs almost always correctly is an art and a science. A teacher's silence is effective with some students. Other students need the explanation repeated, and they need to feel good. They need encouragement (reinforcement). Either way, when learning a language, we need to know we are becoming good, getting better, and achieving the best.

Are teachers the only ones to give feedback and reinforce progress? Not at all. Students often tell teachers how to work with them in  better ways. For example, I do not perform well when someone is always watching me, or explaining things. I get nervous and make mistakes, but I am able to correct myself. I need to think about what I am saying or writing. So I ask talkative teachers,  "Please, give me a moment. Let me think about that."

Students also give their teachers feedback by the look on their faces. Teachers often know when you have a question, are bored, don't understand, or didn't hear the question they just asked! You give "silent" (non-verbal) feedback to teachers all the time. And if teachers need to hear feedback from you, your job is to tell them. For example:

• "Please correct me as I speak not after I finish";
• "I like our lessons when I have the explanation after I try to answer the question"; or
• "I learn new words and expressions when we play language games."

You can help your teacher so that he or she can help you.

Summary. Feedback is information you get or give about what you or someone did. Students and teachers use this information to guide them for learning and teaching. Sometimes feedback is neutral. Sometimes it is not. Feeling good or bad about performance can change future performance. Using just the right word or expression helps. Students and teachers need to find the best ways of giving and getting feedback. Feedback can be given out loud or silently. Lastly, when you or your teacher needs feedback, sometimes it is best to ask for it directly, or tell the other person what works well for you.

---
* Advanced students will see that this answer could be correct. How this might be correct is a subject for another time.